Monday, June 17, 2013

Gods grace is all you need!

Gods grace is all you need.  His grace brings you peace.  God is going to make you strong, and your weak he will be next to you.  God says drive out the enemy

We need to deal with our past in order to experience not only the forgiveness that Jesus brought to us on the cross , but to understand that his grace is sufficient

Why do we live in this land of "mostly forgiving?" Why do we find it so hard to forgive and truly forget? ... God's Grace Is Sufficient I-III

Sunday, November 18, 2012

It's been a long time

Dear friends, It's been such a long time since I have been on my blog.  So many things have happened and changed in my life.  I still struggle with letting Lucky do his thing especially since he still lives under my roof. 

Any ways I have started using twitter you can fnd me at @TinaMLuckenbach.  Would love to hear from all of you. I hope that you are doing well and things are going well with your children.  Currently I am trying to focus on myself and bring more of god into my life to cope with life challenges that make my anxiety so high.

Send all my love, I pray god wraps his arms around you and gives your strength to walk through life challenges.

God Bless,
Luckys Moma

Sunday, January 29, 2012

A Parent's Decisions

As parents we have to make many decisions that our children may or may not like.  On January 18, one day after my son's 21st birthday, I made the decision to tell my child that I wanted him and his belongings out of my house.  I had just had enough with all the stress of him staying with me.  Through out my day as I watched the snow fall. I kept replaying in my head all the times he proclaimed to be an adult. Lucky has done a wonderful job staying clean drug wise for nearly a year.
Now that he has turned the legal drinking age, I see the writing on the wall with my child.  He says He don't have a drinking problem, it was just the drugs. Mind you his father was an alcoholic, on numerous occasions he has drank until he has blacked out, but that's in the past he doesn't have a problem with drinking. Seriously? The day of Lucky's birthday (17th) I called him several times, I was going to take him out 4 dinner.  He never answered, so I went to a movie with a friend.  The next morning I ask son why didn't you answer your phone?  Lucky's response "I was driving mom".  I said son, your an adult you can do as you choose.  Oh my god, I wasn't at a bar mom!!! I totally know that my child was telling a big oh fat lie.    Now he is telling everyone that I threw him out in a winter storm for no reason.
A mother will always love her child! No matter if they claim not to love you!!
Right now I choose me! I want to enjoy my life, travel, do things I have never done. I will always love you son! Some day when you get older you will understand the decision I had to make to get you to stand on your own two feet and be a responsible adult

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Derek Todd Phifer

Today we celebrated my nephews life.  I have attached the video that was made in remembrance of Derek

Thursday, November 24, 2011

November 13, 2011

It was a typical Saturday, got up early to go get coffee.  I was talking to my cousin Melissa on the phone.  Then my best friends husband called. I ignored his call, would call him after my conversation with Melissa.  Well Corey called again and that is not like him.  I knew something was wrong.  Well there was, Derek my 25 year old nephew was in a car accident and he was air lifted to Harbor View in Seattle.  I grabbed Lucky and we headed to the hospital. When we got there I was straight to ICU. They had no record of him.  Derek had come in as a John Doe because they couldn't find any id on him.  We went down stairs and finally found our extended family.  My family was all crying their eyes out.

My nephew Derek & his fiance Tristan had been in a serious accident.  They laid there for six hours before someone walking their dog had found them.  Derek had suffered major head trauma, broken pelvis, and damaged lungs.  Tristan had suffered a 8 inch gash on her head and her spleen was bleeding.

They finally got Derek out of surgery & moved us up to the ICU waiting area. Once they got us settled, we were told the doctor will be out to let us know how he was doing.  What seemed like eternity and then the finally the doctor came out.  Unfortunately what she had to tell us was not good.  Derek suffered major head trauma, stroked out on his left sign of his brain and had no blood flow to that area.  His mother asked if he was going to come out of this okay.  But the doctor said I'm sorry to say this but there is to much damage for Derek  to recover.  My heart sank and broke as I was trying to help pull my sister off the floor.  She started screaming and crying. She told her husband to bring her baby boy back to her!

We were all called back to the hospital very early in the a.m. on Sunday.  The doctors said a decision had to be made regarding Derek's care.  The final decision was made to take him off life support and donate his organs.  We were all allowed to visit him Saturday & Sunday to say our good byes and just spend time with him.  It was so very painful to see a young man that you have known all his life laying there on life support.  His head was so swollen from the brain trauma.

During Derek's final moments all the people who loved and cared for him were in the room.  It was soo painful and heart breaking to watch the people I love in so much pain.  Once Derek passed they took him into the operating room to take his kidneys for donation. One went to UW & the other to a hospital in Idaho.  Derek is living on in another people, which is what he would of wanted.

I guess I am writing about this is because I want young kids to stop thinking nothing is going to happen to you because it will.  My best friend no longer has her baby boy. Do not drink & drive, Do not get high and drive, wear your seat belts.  Call your parents or someone who loves you. One of my son's best friends was here for dinner tonight.  He has a major drinking & drug problem.  I didn't preach at him, but I did tell him that I don't want to have to bury him like I am my nephew.

 RIP Derek Todd Phifer December 2, 1985 to November 13, 2011

Candle Light Vigil @ Crash Site


Lucky is 9 months clean and sober today on Thanksgiving.  I have so much to be grateful for! I love this kid with everything that I have.

Saturday, October 29, 2011


It's been a long time since I've been on here. Been going through lots of changes. Find myself single still. Started a new job at Guild Mortgage. Feels good to be back in the business after 5 years. Lucky has been clean almost 8 months now. He is living at home with me, most of the time I enjoy having him He is working woooo hoooo! I still have moments that I miss Rob...but there's nothing that I can do about that. I have been dating off and on, which really stinks at my age. Enough for now, will be back soon :)