As parents we have to make many decisions that our children may or may not like. On January 18, one day after my son's 21st birthday, I made the decision to tell my child that I wanted him and his belongings out of my house. I had just had enough with all the stress of him staying with me. Through out my day as I watched the snow fall. I kept replaying in my head all the times he proclaimed to be an adult. Lucky has done a wonderful job staying clean drug wise for nearly a year.
Now that he has turned the legal drinking age, I see the writing on the wall with my child. He says He don't have a drinking problem, it was just the drugs. Mind you his father was an alcoholic, on numerous occasions he has drank until he has blacked out, but that's in the past he doesn't have a problem with drinking. Seriously? The day of Lucky's birthday (17th) I called him several times, I was going to take him out 4 dinner. He never answered, so I went to a movie with a friend. The next morning I ask son why didn't you answer your phone? Lucky's response "I was driving mom". I said son, your an adult you can do as you choose. Oh my god, I wasn't at a bar mom!!! I totally know that my child was telling a big oh fat lie. Now he is telling everyone that I threw him out in a winter storm for no reason.
A mother will always love her child! No matter if they claim not to love you!!
Right now I choose me! I want to enjoy my life, travel, do things I have never done. I will always love you son! Some day when you get older you will understand the decision I had to make to get you to stand on your own two feet and be a responsible adult
you did the right thing.Sometimes we have to pull our selfs first and then take that next step you did that..I congratulate you for being the strong woman you are..sure miss you and im glad your still writing on your blog i visit all the time
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Tina - what a tough decision, especially when you are so close to him.
ReplyDeleteMy boy is also 21 and these days I am glad he is living away from home, as I prefer NOT to know about every poor choice he makes. At 21 they want to be normal and do what other normal 21 year olds do - instead of what they know they should do. We can only trust that they now have more knowledge - which will keep them from going back to the dark place.
How come I am just seeing this now??? I don't know, but I can relate to what it feels like to make them leave, and to hear them call themselves an adult (my son just turned 21 in Dec.) but still want help. its all very messy. You are doing the right thing. I hope you share an update soon. Thinking about you.
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